You Think You Know Me

 


I think most of us have been in a public place where someone comes up and starts talking to you as if they know you. The sad part is, they probably do but you don't remember them at all. It's truly a weird situation and quite awkward because you have no idea how to reply to them. I once ran into a woman in the Jewels who started talking about her new dishwasher or something. I felt I had to say something so I asked her how her boys were. She replied she has three girls and just kept on talking as if she didn't notice I was trying to dig a hole to hide in. That's the usual awkward situation, but this one is even stranger because this guy I see occasionally around town seems to know me and I have zero idea who he is. I have pondered this far too long, yet, it's absolutely bizarre that every time I run into him he has conversations as if we know everything about each other. When I say I run into him, he's usually thirty feet away from me when he sees me and starts a conversation. I was again in a grocery store, standing in line, when I hear a voice three aisles down. It's him. He kind of looks like Neil Flynn, the janitor from Scrubs, so I recognize him when he shows up in my life. In the store he starts yelling and pointing at my groceries on the checkout counter and shouts, "Hey, you get a free can of tuna with those noodles. They're right there, over there. You should get a can!"

I didn't want tuna and I wasn't going to get out of line to get a can, but he wouldn't shut the hell up. "It's right there!" Omg, now everyone is looking at me to see if I go get a can. I just wave back to him whereupon he gives me a disgusted look and I grab my groceries and run. I have lived in this town which is not a small town but everyone does seem to know your business. I have seen this guy probably five or six times throughout the years and it's always the same. He never says my name, never asks what's happening in my life, so I wonder if he has me mixed up with someone else. That has happened to me as well, where someone called me, Pam, and started in about her issues of the day. Whaddya do? I stood and nodded my head. I felt kind of sad that I've never met my doppelganger, Pam, and kind of annoyed that this person didn't even notice I wasn't Pam. 

The last time I saw the guy I was at the local baseball game. I saw his giant form a few rows in front of me. He was with another man who was waving a toy on a stick. I tried to make myself small and hoped he wouldn't turn around but he's one of those looky loos who has to see what's going on around him instead of watching the game in progress. I put on my hat and sunglasses and scrunched into my seat. I watched as his head started to pan his surroundings. I whispered, "Don't see me, don't see me." 

He saw me.

"Hey, you should get Kingfisher hat! They're giving them away! Go get one!"

What the phooey. It's like I'm in a Stephen King novel. He's still looking at me, pointing towards the entrance. Again I wave and he gives me a disgusted look and turns back to the game. 

I'm sure he'll be at my funeral. He might have some great stories about us. I'll never know. 

Life is weird.


Comments

ex-ferrer said…
I had a gal messing with me in the checkout line at Aldi's several weeks ago. She was having fun and I knew that and played along. The whole thing was fun because another woman in line pointed out that SHE was holding up the line, also good naturedly. I don't know a lot of people in town who aren't my cousins or cousin adjacent. When I was done with my business and able to check her out better, I realized I did sorta know her. Then it hit me. She was Michele, my cousin Brian's friend whom I met when I was helping him move. Then she was like: "Oh, yeah! *I* remember *you*!" and that she always acts that way in public like she hadn't actually recognized me. Well, that was bullshit. She made me from Jump Street and that's why she was being so boisterous. I had liked her right away the day we first met but really hadn't registered her face fully in my memory banks. So, it was fun and nice to catch up. I may recognize her next time I see her. Who knows? Same store (mighta been same day) a woman who I thought resembled a girl cousin of mine, approached me and asked if I was *Joe Smucatelli*. I wasn't, of course, and she asked me if I was sure about that. I was! Nice lady. I spent the rest of the day wondering who that Joe was and if it was a good or bad thing to be mistaken for him.
August 4, 2026 at 10:20 AM
Maggie said…
I wish I had a better memory. I bet we see the same people all the time but never register it. The woman from taxi remembers people and even the dates they met. It's some sort of super power a few people have
August 4, 2026 at 1:12 PM
Post a Comment

Popular posts from this blog

The Best Books Of All Time?

Image
  😬 I consider myself an avid reader. Having noted that, there are very few books I have read from The Guardian's best 100 books of all time. My list is less than a dozen, even counting a few I started and never finished. 174 prominent writers participated in creating brain food for your pleasure. They each contributed ten of their favorite reads and someone somewhere somehow tabulated the favorites. Without further ado, the number one book of all time is ...... Middlemarch. The fucking hell it is. Lol. Like art, what you like is subjective. Some people believe Manga is good stuff. Others prefer historical novels, blah, blah, blah. I suppose the list is supposed to be taken more seriously because actual writers who make a living writing books have listed what they deemed the best read. I'm not a writer. I suppose like a musician who reads notes, understands the structure, the form, the timbre, they can recognize the whole. I just want a book that will entertain me and not try...
Read more

She's Still Dead

Image
   Ashli Babbitt was a traitor to this country. They can have all the ceremonial shenanigans the military likes to present as the deceased has been offered full military honors (We all know who requested that) it still won't negate the fact that she and thugs like her stormed a government building to do harm to others. They shit in the hallways. They carried confederate flags. They brought zip ties, bats and rage. The current regime can sugar coat it all they want but one day the orange man will be manure for his golf course grass and we can go back to truth being important. She deserved to be shot. More of them should have been shot that day. Every police officer should have followed the example of the police officer who did his job that day. These deplorables remind me of the fictional character, Ignatius J. Reilly, a lazy, selfish narcissist who decided to gather the factory employees in protest of some useless, archaic self indulgent mischief. He brought from home his soil...
Read more

Benny, Benny And No Regrets

Image
  It's just so hard to keep up with maga creeps. Here's Benny  Johnson, the guy who started the rumor that DC was a cesspool. He also claimed his house burned down while his family was in it. He's a liar. His house never burned down. You really can't believe much of what this asshat says because he has a habit of playing with facts. He also likes to steal other people's words. He has been fired and suspended numerous times for plagiarism, at least 41 times. It just boggles my mind when these people blatantly lie, then are outraged when called out. People like Johnson, Trump and Leavitt have probably lived their whole lives creating a make believe existence where lying is the norm. At some point it just becomes routine where they find lying acceptable and necessary. To me they are empty shells of mindless walking automatons. They live in a bubble of falsehoods. These are the people in charge of our country.  The NYTimes has done a story about Pinocchio Johnson. I dec...
Read more