Thingy

  "Oh, we love him but me and Daryl think he's hiding the truth cause people will just go crazy if they knowed what really happened. I was shaving Daryl's back cause he was gonna apply at the Whine and Diner. He's a real good cook. Grits, and gumbo is his specialty. Anyhoo, I usually get on the Fox News with Jesse Watters. He's so handsome. Anyways, they showed us the volcano and the UFO comin' out of it. Where was it Daryl - one of them third world countries, like Paraquat. But then we seen it, right Daryl? I'M TELLING THEM 'BOUT THE ALIEN SPACESHIP! Don't mind him. He can't hear too well after blowing off some fireworks last fourth. Anyways, we seen it fly out of that burning volcano. They must've couldna breathe in there, or the heat was killin' 'em. They all tryna cover it up as a coingkeydink but that's just ridiculous. Any fool can see it weren't no meteor. It went up and out, didn't it, Daryl? Will you leave that d...

  The 250 clambake is turning into another debacle. How shocking. The White House is starting to look like it's in the ghetto. First they tore down Jackie's garden and mama liked the roses. There's no bringing it back. Now that the musicians who normally follow the carny town circuit these days have suddenly realized the party wasn't for us, but for Trump. Suspicious minds wonder why they didn't catch on sooner. What else could Trump do but to be a flaming star and declare the show must go on? I was a bit confused when he started to rip it up about being as great as Elvis. WTF!? Now he's going to sing? No. Worse. He's going to talk. About himself. I'd prefer a little less conversation. Pete Haggis is also making some rules. They can't seem to be able to fill in the seats at the giant circus tent/cage out on the White House lawn, so the brown eyed handsome man would like to invite the military to fill in- on their own dime of course, aaaaand, their wa...

  As I ride my bike (no, that's not me above) going nowhere because it's a stationary bike, I like to watch Stingray Cityscapes on Roku. Wow! We get a bird's eye view of various cities, something we can never do in real life. I've only just begun but have a few favorites. Los Angeles is absolutely stunning. I think it is one of my favorite cities, from above anyway. Boston, Dallas, Malaysia and Switzerland are all cities that have been beautifully designed by incorporating the old with the new. Some cities look as if, well, if the orange man had been at it. Big, ugly monstrosities that are built next to a Shakey's Sugar Shack or stand away from any other buildings. Detroit from above looks no better than Detroit down below. It tries, but it's really boring. Nothing stands out. They're just a bunch of big cement building blocks. Even Paris from above is underwhelming. You have to explore that city to find the beauty. These beautiful scenic adventures are alle...

 She's back and she's gonna say nuthin'.  Patting her blondi do set with Elmer's glue  baring her grill her voice a siren shrill She's back and she's gonna say nuthin'. Under illuminating lights Beware the bitch, she bites  She's made of vinegar and ice  witchery is her vice Step far away from her spittle  her voice so harsh and brittle  Pammy is her name subterfuge is her game She's back and she's gonna say  nuthin'. A Medusa snakey sneer An orange man in her ear A pencil up her butt along with files filled with  smut She's gonna be mute She thinks she's awfully  cute  Swore an oath on a Bible  Lo, little lady ladels libel  Do the Bondi shuffle  a back and forth kerfuffle  She's back and she's gonna say  nuthin'. * Update  

  I occasionally like to read the advice columns. It helps me adjust my moral compass when someone asks a question I would answer quite differently, like this query where a woman asks if she should leave her husband after fifty years of marriage as he has never said a kind word, ever.  (Aunt Blabby is taking the night off. I'm going to step in) My response: Lol. Seriously, lady? Fifty years and it just dawned on you to get out of a shitty relationship? And you need to ask!? Advice columnist: I'm so sorry you feel unwanted. Perhaps talking to a therapist will help. Talk to your husband. Tell him how you feel. It's never too late to change. Me again: Uh, yes, it is too late. Just stay with him and take it.  So, as you can see, I could never be a wise and thoughtful advisor, yet, sometimes, I think the advice columnists get it wrong, so very, very wrong. Case in point 👉 this recent post where a man wanted to know if he should just face the fact his sister no longer wants to...

  Whyyyy back in my day I roamed the hood all day long, unafraid and unmolested. Sure, there were creeps and some found me, like the time my parents sat in a bar whilst I was given my "license" to be independent and sit in the car. Someone I knew, one of those types who have stupid nicknames as adults, like Scooter, knocked on the car window, then sat at up front, telling me how pretty I was. It wasn't until years later I realized he was masturbating as he flattered a seven year olds ego. But, I usually felt safe as I explored my world. This mother wants her children to be independent and allows them to walk to and from school, a mile away. She lets them play alone in the park and provides them with "licenses," which inform any nosy bodies she does know where her children are, and it's all good. Yes, I'm sure a child molester will back off after reading that. I do hope she's also taught them how to grab balls and squeeze, poke out eyes and scream, ...