Bits Of Enlightenment



 I should probably leave this alone, but sometimes I just like to poke at things that are out of my understanding and maybe become enlightened a bit. 

So, is the thing where singers bring someone on stage and stick their bits in their face something y'all are familiar with? Last time I went to a concert was when Dylan performed and some woman jumped out of her seat and started dancing in front of him. The song ended, she went back in her seat and Dylan tipped his hat and they moved on. There was no bed onstage and there definitely was no writhing or rubbing going on. So I keep going back to this story about Usher having a beautiful woman from the audience come up on stage, lie in the bed as he sings and plays with himself. Well, first of all, Usher ain't no Lenny Kravitz and even if he was, what the fuck is happening here!? Is this not 2026? I know I've mentioned I'm losing days but now I'm in 1970!? 

Anyway, a very pretty lady is sitting up there while Usher is doing his wiggle and she is stone cold not into it. He would have gotten a better reaction from a mannequin. So he gets angry and gestures for his bros to escort her off the stage.

And then, she gets reamed because she wanted nothing to do with his bits in her face. To paraphrase...

"Giiiirrrrlllll, what you think was gonna happen up there!?"

Oooh, and then black weaves flew. Her response was kind of weird. I've had some fights in my day, only with pasty white Catholic girls, and it never got to this. She claims she didn't know Usher was gonna be up there. Well, who the hell was she expecting!? 


All the while Mrs. Usher is backstage watching this and apparently approving her man gyrating in front of other women. 

What happened to singers singing? Sure, we had a few slime bags who pranced around with barely dressed ladies back in the day, but mostly if you're a talented human with a decent song you don't need the theatrics, especially soft porn, live in studio B. 

I might be a hypocrite, though, because if Bob Dylan or Jesse Welles brought me onstage and rubbed their guitar all over me, I'm going for it. 

It's all silly and weird and for fucks sake just sing a song and keep your bits in your pants. 

Comments

Popular posts from this blog

She's Still Dead

The Best Books Of All Time?

Benny, Benny And No Regrets