Don't Axe For It

 Word is Matthew McConaughey doesn't use deodorant. I guess he thinks men should smell like wild beasts so the women folk come a calling. According to the Daily Rag more men are choosing to forego pit perfume and go au natural on a first  date. I truly find it hard to believe this story where the male subject purposely avoids taking a shower as a means to impress a gal. For an added aroma boost, they also will put on a shirt that has been at the bottom of the laundry basket for a few weeks. They really want those pheromones to find their way to their chosen victim's sensory receptors. I didn't read the whole article, so I have no idea if this new way of seduction actually works. 

As a woman, I will share my experience in this matter. If you come to a first date with dirty hair, smelly pits, stinky socks, it will be your last date. In fact, it won't even get started. I don't like to be around people who are a walking dumpster. I'm  not a dog who needs to sniff your nether regions as a way to get to know you. If you are still around awhile as we live, laugh and learn more about each other, I might need your manly muscles and if you  you sweat, I might come a calling. Everyone has a different scent. I prefer a male who exudes a light musky scent- not bison musky, more like taking a walk on an Autumn morning, sniffing a hint of apple and cherry wood. Then you have the guy who breaks a sweat opening a jar of pickles and ya wanna just dunk your head in the pickle jar to avoid the wafting odors emanating off the pickle jar man. 

Men never really ever had to be desperate to get a date, did they? I'm not saying it's easy. I could never work up the nerve to ask anyone out knowing I could be rejected. Do that a dozen times to me and I will join a convent, so I applaud you guys who make the first move. But I was under the assumption if you just keep looking around and ask a girl out, you'll get lucky. Now it seems voodoo hoodoo is in order to attract the female. The younger generation has come to realize they don't need a guy to make themselves feel worthy. They don't need to be married by 23 and give up their dreams for anyone. So I suppose y'all gotta come up with some interesting ideas on how to keep a girl wanting more.

Let me tell ya- stinky man pits is not the answer. Walking into a first date as if you couldn't care less about how you look, is not the way to go. If you haven't noticed most women put a load of effort into looking and smelling good. I'm going to bet if a woman walked into the first date with unshaved pits, no make-up, a soiled sweatshirt, you wouldn't bother asking for another meet and greet. 

I'm just trying to save you some embarrassment, guys. I don't want you, ten years from now, looking back at what you thought was a brilliant idea at the time and lose sleep over it. 

First date- shower, clean your nails, wear clean clothes and antiperspirant. You don't need to go heavy on the Axe body spray. On the contrary. Just be clean and don't smell like an overripe durian. Ease into the pheromone bit. Maybe after a third date you can let her sniff the man scent.