And Now Our Halftime Guest, Lee Greenwood!

Lee Greenwood at Halftime 

Mike Johnson doesn't know who Bad Bunny is. Well, I don't either, but I know millions of people do. Word is Bad Bunny is going to perform during half time at the Superbowl. Why we are discussing football now when baseball is still happening is beyond me. The last time I watched a Superbowl show was in 2014 with Bruno Mars. Anyway, ol' Mike, who was born in 1972, would like Lee Greenwood to perform. First of all, the guy is 82 years old. He had a hit in 1984, when Mike was 12. Mike also found Jesus around this time. Maybe it was the song that turned him to Jesus and fanatic patriotism. I remember people got really emotional when 'God Bless the USA,' played in the fields and over the airwaves. It was a true maga song, one that brought tears out of 300 pound lumberjacks. But, I doubt Greenwood has gotten out of his barcalounger in ages to sing in public. 

Mike would have been 17 in 1989, a time when young adults think about their future. Sexual awakening was front and center and all around. There are rumors regarding Johnson's sexual preferences. As a born again tongue talker this was probably a rough time for Mike. Did Mike suppress feelings that were deemed filthy, sinful acts? Is this why Mike is Mike? Is his whole life one big lie? Perhaps that is why he finds it so easy to avoid confrontation and not face the truth. The Berlin Wall had fallen, a massacre occurred in Tiananman Square, some guy named Seinfeld had a tv show about nothing and Billy Joel didn't start the fire. I looked up a load of information about Johnson awhile back because he had outed my inner rage button. I wrote this poem (my highest viewed post) Unfortunately, I know more than I ever want to know about him. His parents were young and dumb and fooled around and had an "oops." It allegedly was a marriage of convenience rather than love. I imagine young Mike, tiny little Mike, being pushed into corners whilst the jocks and cheerleaders cavorted as he read his Bible. If Carrie had been a boy, she would have been Mike. Now, Johnson is seeking his revenge for every sleight, every knuckle sandwich and every time he had been told he was a mistake. He's now going after the cool people. Seriously though, Mike, no one wants Lee Greenwood at the Superbowl unless he can sing, Me Porto Bonito in two part harmony. Focus on that E list and swearing in a certain Democrat so we can see the alleged E list. Get your goons to open the government by voting to help, not hurt American citizens. And maybe, just maybe, instead of reading the Bible, spend some time on inner reflection. Ask yourself why a man who claims to be a child of God is such a reprehensible little weasel.

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