Neil The Seal

 


Neil the seal is an asshole. 

He's a five year old elephant seal who weighs 1,300 pounds and will get much bigger. Neil lives on and around the Tasman Peninsula. Neil does whatever he wants and no one is going to stop him. The citizens love him. The authority is frustrated - with Neil and the citizens. 

When Neil comes ashore he likes to hang out around the hazard cones. I'm guessing the town is broke due to Neil destroying everything in his path. He also likes to scream at the residents if they refuse to feed him. 

He's a character as they say and it might sound amusing at the moment because he hasn't hurt anyone. Yet. He's going to get bigger. He's going to become a belligerent bastard tenfold and he will continue his path of destruction. 


So, what is the solution? They've already tried to relocate him and he just comes back. The Peninsula is about 250 square miles. Seems like the young lad should be able to find a quiet spot. Neil likes his cones. He probably likes the attention. Neil is a weirdo. Whatever the decision, no one will be happy, but everyone will be alive. 

Good luck, Tasmania. Let's all cross our fingers Neil does not suffer the same fate as Freya, a walrus from Norway, who too became a tourist attraction. The authorities grew so concerned regarding Freya's growing interaction with humans, they euthanized her. I'd like to think there are better options for Neil, one where the animal lives a happy and free existence away from people. It's getting more difficult for humans and wild animals to coexist. It's our fault. All of it. And yet, they are the ones who pay the price. Our very own USDA Wildlife Service kills a million wild animals - annually. Annually. They shoot, gas and snare. That is just the stats for wild animals. I cannot even contemplate the number of domesticated furry babies who are killed each year. 

I absolutely understand people wanting to go have a look at that crazy bastard seal. I most likely would check him out if I lived down under. Whaddya gonna do- ignore a 1,300 pound blob who takes a nap in the middle of Main Street? Neil's days are numbered on the peninsula.

Good luck and do not feed the wild animals, even if they scream at you.

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