Jimothy Ain't No Cricket

 


I got frickin annoyed yesterday on Bluesky because I wasn't in on the newest gossip around the cooler.

"Jimothy? Is he new? What's so damn special about Jimothy? He's not getting my job!"

I soon learned Jimothy eats garbage and sleeps all day- cause he's a RACCOON! HA!

Apparently a woman was sitting in a park just minding her business when this hairy ball trots by. Jimothy would be considered a special needs child if he was human. Fortunately, the raccoon couldn't care less what you think of him. He's living his best life and the other raccoons don't whisper behind his back or come up to him and shout, "What happened to you!?" Then he's gotta explain he was born with a spinal defect as the curious lose interest and back away. Next time Jimothy should tell them he got squished in a garbage truck or something dramatic. 

Over five million and counting have viewed the video as the human records the raccoon sauntering to wherever he's going. She also named him. For all we know his name is Fred but Jimothy will do unless we hear otherwise. Tomorrow I might hear a story about a guy named, Bob, who just invented a rice cake that tastes like tiramisu and not cardboard and probably never give him another thought, but ten, twenty years from now, probably on my death bed as I think about my life, I'll think of Jimothy. I hope he lives long and prospers. Be kind. Don't stare. And live your life with no fucks to give about what others think of you.

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