Cookies for 4.20

 


I must be getting senile. I know I wrote an entire post about my very short time with the Girl Scouts. Mom wasn't exactly reliable getting me to scout meetings where we made aprons and stuff for our future as wives of boy scouts, who are no longer called boy scouts. I think they tried to be more inclusive by calling themselves, 'Just Scouts,' or something inoffensive, like, 'The Guilt Tripped Ass Kissers.' It didn't please Pete Hegseth at all. How dare the boys club include girls and gays! Boy Scouts were for grooming young boys to become raping old scouts who knew where to find their victims. They were also taught how to survive in a jungle and make ship's knots, as if that would ever come along in real life.

Well, Pete won't be happy to learn the little ladies came up with a scathingly brilliant idea. Sell their high priced, cardboard tasting cookies to drug users. Sorry, kids, cannabis is a drug, legal or not. At least the girl scouts went the legal route and placed their wares in front of a weed dispensary. Now that's a lesson to teach young minds about business. Know your target. Anyway, word got out and the cookie caper was shut down. I'm not sure what the problem was. Everything was legal. The orange man and his minions should have been proud by how these future voters learned a life using lesson. Know your target audience. Play to their weakness. In this case, a munchie quest. Trump knows all about the art of the deal. Call your followers stupid and useless, but do it in a manly way so they aren't offended. 

"Haha, Mabel, look at that man. He's a billionaire so he musta be right smart. Haha, did he just call us stupid? Damn, he's so manly. I'ma gonna buy his Rump watch cause he's a real man."

The girls learned another valuable lesson. People are hypocrites. The majority of these party poopers who complained about scout number 420, are the same people who snort coke, guzzle beer and wine, pop pills to sleep, wake up, cope. These are the people who cheat on their taxes, steal their children's bank savings, and snitch on their neighbors and the Girl Scouts of America. 

So, girls, you are on your way to becoming a real American. Steal, lie, use, fake it, cheat, snitch and find the easy way. 

Comments

ex-ferrer said…
I think you did mention this before because I seem to recall noting that I got kicked out of Cub Scouts for eating a Brownie in my tent. I won't do that joke again as it's crass and not at all politically correct. Also, it's not true, as most jokes are. Anyways, I like the Thin Mints!
March 9, 2026 at 11:48 AM
Maggie said…
How dare you you taint my innocent ears! Yep, those are the best, only not for $7.
March 9, 2026 at 12:50 PM
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