Spare ( me)

 I just couldn't do it. I had about fifty pages left but gave up reading Prince Harry's memoir, 'Spare.' I should have stopped soon after reading this paragraph near the very start.

"The weather was quintessentially April. Not quite winter, not yet spring. The trees were bare, but the air was soft. The sky was gray, but the tulips were popping. The light was pale, but the indigo lake ..."

(This is where I insert meme of child with smirk on face, or, Homer Simpson backing into the bushes- if I had the copyright)

Most celebs have a ghostwriter. I remember listening to a radio host interview Maureen McCormick, Marcia, Marcia, Marcia, from the 70's tv show, The Brady Bunch., who was promoting her memoirs. The host asked questions as he read passages, then he delivered a quote. Maureen said, (I'm paraphrasing) "Oh, that's nice. Who said that?" After an appropriate amount of silence, he replied, "Supposedly, you." 

Harold chose J. R. Moehringer, the author of 'The Tender Bar,' as his ghostwriter. I'm visualizing the prince meeting with J.R. and requesting something along these lines, "Tell them I loved mummy, dislike Willy, hate the step, but most of all, tell them on each and every page how much I hate the paps." (paparazzi)

He truly hates them.

I understand. He blames them for his mother's death. He blames them for hounding him constantly, then writing nasty lies about him in their rags. He is angry with Pa, (Charles) for advising his "darling boy," to ignore the press. 

I liked Harry and Meghan before I read the book. I still do. I do know they were treated unkindly by the Murdochs and other hacks who don't care about destroying someone's reputation. The rag writers get paid by the line and close up images, preferably of celebrities showing their naughty bits or drinking ale from an enemy's skull. Yes, they are truly despicable beings. Anyone who reads can figure that out.

The book is still awful. It's beyond boring. It is painful to slog through. I don't know if Harry would have fared better with a different ghostwriter; or,  better yet, if he had written it himself.  

I feel little sympathy for him as he struggles to find his own autonomy. He, as the British say, whinges, incessantly. Doing stupid things such as wearing a Nazi uniform to a costume party didn't help, especially when he can't explain his reasoning for doing such an idiotic thing other than to say he wasn't thinking. Yeah, doesn't make for great reading. He just doesn't delve too far into anything he does. 

Mummy died. I was sad.

Daddy married his mistress.

I like war.

I hate the paps. 

I believe it's the only reason he had this book written, to tell everyone how much he hates them. So, so much.

Are there any interesting or new tidbits in the book?

He did fly helicopters. He was in the army for ten years.

He killed a few Taliban.

His penis got frostbitten during a hike to Antarctica.

Willy is an arse.

I slogged through until the Meghan days arrived. Again, they truly seem to me like good people. He and Meghan are involved in many worthy causes. However, 407 pages was far too long. Perhaps a 1,500 word article would have done the job. He certainly made a profit in book sales and I don't begrudge his wealth. Money was left from mummy. Money from Gan Gan (his grandmother) Money from lawsuits he has won. He doesn't have to worry about the cost of eggs.

It's tough to once being openly regarded as the spare by Willy and Pa (So he claims) He's gone down the line a bit now, so he need not worry. There are plenty of spares before him.

The only way he can move on is by his actions. He actually doesn't have to prove himself to anyone, but that's the kind of sensitive guy he is. I wish he had tried to write this by himself, instead of, we the readers being subjected to lines like...

"Oh. A biro. Wow."

**I swear I didn't hound them. Image is AI generated by Freepik.