Magafixation

 


When did this happen? When did women start wanting to look like Kabuki performers? I don't want to solely condemn the women in the Reich because this look is prevalent on both sides. It's definitely a high maintenance, hours long process. You won't find too many ladies who live in double wides spending hours trying to achieve the living mannequin/Billy the puppet vision, mainly because it's expensive. I'm not saying they don't try. But you don't see a lot of neck tattoos whilst wearing Michael Kors. 

Is this a look humans find irresistible? Why else would (mostly) women agree to look like softer versions of Steven Tyler? Why!?

Like Dolly Parton says, "It takes a lot of money to  look this cheap." Yes, the beauty industry is worth around 624 billion dollars. Each American spends an average of $900 per year to look "marvelous." Lol. No. Someone is using my share.

When did duck lips, four inch nails, six inch eyelashes, saline bags, Brazilian waxing, eyebrow threading, Botox, three layers of foundation, and blinding white teeth become a thing?

Who's responsible for this?

According to a pseudo scientist it only takes 100 jumps to change the course of evolution. Read the scientific gobbledygook here.

My summary of the story... It all started when monkeys got a hankering for sweet potatoes but they didn't like the sand that covered their treat. Eventually, one young female monkey took her potatoes down to the sea and washed them. Her bff, started washing her potatoes too, until 100 monkeys caught on and it became a thing. Then they all washed their taters and frolicked in the sea. Even monkeys who lived in far off lands were washing sweet potatoes.

Scientists who went to the smart schools tend to disregard this 100 monkeys effect.

Yet... one monkey started puckering up her lips thinking she looked fabulous, and the look caught on. Now they all do it. 

Considering Dolly has been around for two hundred years and has enough filler to caulk a house, I'm aiming my chin hairs in her direction.

Yeah, that's right. I'm all natural. I wash my face with dish soap. I haven't worn makeup since I had my face painted by a wench at the Renaissance Faire. Somewhere around here is a razor, idk. I own two pairs of shoes - Skechers and flip flops.

I'm no monkey, pal. 

*Sorry, can't credit image of Billy the Pup...I mean, Laura Loomer

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