She's Gotta Ticket To Ride

 

Me and Joe - we like trains. When I was younger sitting in coach with all the other poor saps didn't bother me. It's when they start talking we have a problem. I've taken the Greyhound a few times and would choose to walk with thumbtacks in my shoes before I ever get on another bus again. Talk about drama. Yes, it is like the scene from, 'Trains, Planes and Automobiles where couples engage in coitus, drunks sing or argue, men hit on women and in my case, the last time I traveled by bus, I sat next to a farm boy who was coming back from his Mama's funeral. And the stupid bus driver ran over a spike so we were stranded in the middle of the Mojave desert. I don't like to fly. Not because the plane goes up in the sky, but because of all the preflight shenanigans. As an introvert I cannot deal. I've seen enough videos lately where people just go batty due to alcohol, drugs or both. At least on a train I can get off. The last trip was one of those adventures where I felt I was a character in a soap. Not a main character - actually just an extra, who pretended to be listening to someone babble on about horses when I really wanted to hear the dramedy across the aisle.

I knew she was a grifter the minute she boarded the train. She was young and cute, in a grungy, hippie, artsy way. She sat behind two young men around her age and commenced to pull out a sketchbook and colored pencils. Soon the conductor came around asking for tickets. The young lady, let's call her, Sarah, handed over a ticket and the conductor looked it over and noticed the ticket was in someone else's name. She explained her boyfriend had made the reservation for her and he seemed to have bought this because eventually we were on our way. As she had previously boarded the two men had noticed her as well. Who wouldn't. Long auburn dreadlocks, big blue eyes, a fragile aura about her some men are drawn to. They see a Bambi surrounded by danger and feel the need to protect this maiden. Oh, if only I had a bag of popcorn. Now since they were in front of her it would have been far too obvious to turn around without it being awkward, so I waited, and the young blond male, let's call him, Sucker, got up, did a little stretch and turned around to look at Sarah. He said he liked what she was drawing and the dance began. As they, well, he, talked, the conductor came back and leaned down to speak with Sarah. People stopped chewing. Babies stopped crying. The train whistle ended mid shriek as we all leaned in listen.

"There seems to be a problem with your ticket, ma'am. We tried to verify your claim the ticket was meant for you. The man we talked to says otherwise. Do you mind coming with me so we can straighten this out?"

We all watched as she grabbed her backpack and followed the conductor. Sucker seemed to be especially worried as he pondered with his friend what the problem could be. He had known her about fifteen minutes and was hooked. His friend didn't seem concerned. In fact, he covered his face and went to sleep. Eventually we went back to minding our own damn business and I assumed we had seen the last of Sarah. Lo and behold, after an hour she comes back. Sucker asks if she's ok. She claims this guy she broke up with is trying to get back at her by saying she stole the ticket. Since the ticket is in his name, she would either have to buy a ticket or get off at the next stop which was an hour away. So then she borrows Sucker's phone and heads towards the bathrooms to try and raise funds. Sucker is very worried. A woman in the back of the car is also worried for Sarah. The two discuss the problem of a person one has known for thirty minutes and the other because she had good hearing. 

Sarah comes back all sad and waiflike. She mentions with a quiver in her voice she cannot reach anyone and will sadly have to get off at the next stop where only cowboys and Amish folks live. She pulls out her sketchbook and begins to draw once again. Sucker turns around, "Don't you have family to call?" Sarah explains she's all alone in the world. Her boyfriend was abusive and threw her out, keeping all her belongings. She was hoping to meet a girlfriend in Seattle. Now, she was homeless, penniless and on a train to Mudville. 

We all can hear the Sucker's brain calculating his chances. Should he help the damsel in distress and perhaps be rewarded, or does he end the dance right then and there? 

Tick tock tick tock tick tock...

"Well, I can lend you the money to get to Seattle. You can pay me back when you get on your feet." 

Before Sarah could reply the woman from the back jumps out of her seat and staggers up to Sarah's seat. "I know someone who's looking for help in his restaurant. I can call him right now!"

And with that, Sucker bought her a valid ticket and everyone was happy. By the time we came to the next stop where people could get off for a few moments, seven people had gathered around Sarah as they conversed and smoked. Sucker was standing on the outside of this circle clearly annoyed he didn't have the lady's full attention. In fact, she seemed to be purposely avoiding him. 

A muffled voice came over the intercom. Dinner would commence shortly. Sucker invited Sarah to dine with him. She accepted and off they went. I sat in my seat, ate a granola bar and watched the sun set as the miles rolled by. Eventually the growing group of Sarah's new friends came back and settled into their seats. Even the train conductor seemed enamored with the lovely, vulnerable Sarah. He stopped by to watch her draw and talk about his home in Montana. Sucker chewed his nails. 

The car became quiet as we settled in for an uncomfortable night sleeping on a train seat that gave no room to stretch. I looked out the window only to see the reflection of sleeping passengers and one young lady who grabbed her backpack and got off at the next stop where she walked into the arms of a long haired, tattooed male waif. 

As the sun rose we heard Sucker complain. "Man, that's all the money I had. I don't even have a dollar for a cup of coffee." We all sighed. His friend, who had slept through the entire show asked Sucker what the problem was. Sucker angrily got up and was never seen again. 

So, moral of the story. Sometimes, when you take a chance, hoping to get laid, or have a future with a stranger on a train, be prepared to be disappointed. Life is a gamble. Sucker lost the bet. 

Well played, Sarah. Well played.

(((Applause))))

The End.

*My photos. AI generated image using Night Cafe.