"Respect our privacy"


 Those are the sentiments from actor Tommy Lee Jones regarding the death of his daughter, who was found in a hotel room on New Year's day. It's the number four most viewed article in The Guardian. 

We see this all the time with well known people who suffer a tragedy. "Thank-you and please leave us alone." 

So, why don't we listen? And what exactly does that mean? There's a considerable difference between peering into someone's window or knocking on their door for answers and just being curious, wondering what exactly happened. I don't think people who want to know more about a famous person's personal life are enjoying some sort of schadenfreude. I think they are truly concerned and want to know how the family is coping. Yes, they're like us. Go figure. They have personal problems. They have family members who are mentally ill or have a drug addiction or don't get along. I don't read these stories with any sort of glee, happy these people are suffering simply because they seemingly have it easier than us. We have made an emotional connection to many of these actors or writers because of something they said or did, whether it was just a line for them, for us, it resonated something within. 

I can only imagine the stress and worry the Reiners went through in their lives, trying to heal their broken child, even to the point of blaming themselves. The Reiner case is an extreme example because their lives were taken by their son, a very sick man. Honestly, I wasn't even that interested in the news about Jones' daughter until he asked for privacy. They have the right to mourn without people hounding them with cameras and questions. You can ask a psychiatrist why we don't respect their wishes. I don't know. 

I'm normally not interested in celebrity news, but when I read about a conservative whose platform is based on "family values," who gets caught cheating on his wife or watching child pornography, I'm interested. I want them to be hounded. I want them to be faced with their hypocrisy every single day. No, I will not respect your right to privacy. I want your name and number and I want you to be shamed, if that's possible. Unfortunately, I can only venture into their creepy, dark world for so long and then must search for the happy places. 

Usually we move on to the next story to follow so people can grieve and be left alone. Not everyone is allowed that privilege. How long have we been talking about Marilyn Monroe who has been dead for sixty-four years!? There is absolutely nothing new we can learn about her life and death, and yet, she still cannot get one day of peace. (You know what I mean)

The sad part is, Tommy Lee Jones, people will move on. The harsh reality is very few will remember your daughter's name. You will finally be left alone to grieve. I'm not sure if that's any better than complete strangers, who might have gone through the same thing by losing a child feeling sympathy and a connection for your loss by wanting to know more- more than you are prepared to share. 

Privacy is becoming a lost expectation, not only for the famous, but for everyone who has a story. And we all have a story. 

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